this is the worst thing i can write.

I am david lee roth I am bret easton ellis i am bruce wayne but i may also be len bias.
no i am not any of these and most likely never will be
i am not one who decides on enjoying some cocaine in the middle of summer or in the brash of winter
i prefer being someone else i guess
even though in this case someone else seems like everyone else that doesnt do cocaine
and im not saying its a bad thing (but of course it is) and i wont put you down for whatever you do because maybe i cant stop you
time doesnt seem to be a matter to some but id like to keep my life right on track for atleast as long as i can.

___________________________________________
today i am starting a new journey
i want to be able to just say hello or goodbye
or ask how youve been because i know this life doesnt seem the greatest
i want to get out there and show im not a bad person but i can be extremly friendly
YES i am friendly but extremely shy as well and that makes me seem foolish and not confident and then my life goes spiraling down into a pit that ends up filling me with depression but i guess its not too bad i mean eventually i can pick myself back up

"So are you still saying im not when I already am( you keep on kicking me down)
And why are you still saying we wont when we already are(you keep on kicking me down,you keep on kicking me down))
Ain’t it a shame to be so young and insane"

thats exactly what i am but no one truely knows that because i tend to be all hidden or i end up coming off as annoying and it makes me seem so out of touch with my living.

"And give it up
Don’t turn away
This time could be different
You’re making this difficult
Just thought I loved you more
The way you leave
I’ll be starting a new life on my own
Cus it’s a constant tragedy
Connecting you and I
And I love when I hear you say:
I want to feel alive
I want to be with you one more night
Just you and I
And the city lights
We’ll do it one more time
Except this time we’ll get it right"

and my throat is getting tight
and my vocal chords are ready to shake but cant make the first move
and my heart is pumping so much
and i seem so foolish
and i put myself down in the ending anyway
just because i dont know what to do.
i just dont want him to see what ive written.